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> Guess what? (Well, you probably already know from the subject line, but
> anyway...) Last night, I had a dream I met Mr. T! It was great! Well,
> it started out great. Then it kind of downgraded from there. He was
> over at my parents' house, (for some reason), and I went over there and
> saw him out in the garage working on his van. I was like, "Hey, Mr. T!
> I was your biggest fan when I was a kid!" And I ran up and gave him a
> big hug, and I was like "Do you wanna hang out today?"
>
> He said, "Mr. T loves his fans!" So and but we ended up hanging out
> together. What a dream come true for me (well, not really; as it turns
> out, it was actually a dream all along).
>
> So we were hanging out, Mr. T and me, and I was trying to show him how
> much I loved him, so I kept quoting old lines from "The A-Team," so he
> would know I was for real. Mr. T was impressed. He was like, "Most
> people don't even know those lines!"
>
> I said, "Yeah, I bet everybody probably says 'I pity the fool' all the
> time, right?"
>
> He was like, "YEAH, everybody says that. I get real tired of that
> line!" (Imagine Mr. T yelling everything he says, 'cause that's what it
> was like.)
>
> And I was like, "Yeah, most people probably wouldn't even know that line
> isn't even from 'The A-Team."
>
> He said, "Yeah, that was from 'Rocky III'!"
>
> I said, "Yeah! 'Rocky III'!" It was great. We were really connecting,
> Mr. T. and me.
>
> Well apparently, the whole time he was hanging out with me, Mr. T must
> have thought I was a kid. Because at won point, he found out I was an
> adult, and he got kind of peeved at me and said, "I thought you said you
> was a kid!"
>
> I was kind of taken aback. I said, "No, I said I was your biggest fan
> when I was a kid. I'm not a kid anymore. I'm a 30 year old man." After
> that, his whole attitude towards me changed. He only seemed to like me
> when he thought I was a kid. (Why did he think I was a kid, anyway?)
>
> I said, "I thought you loved your fans."
>
> He said, "Mr. T got no time for grown men! Mr. T. loves his little
> brothers and sisters, not some 30 year old man!" (Apparently this took
> place a year ago, because I am actually 31.)
>
> After a while, I think I really started getting on his nerves, 'cause I
> kept on quoting "A-Team" lines, like, "We're takin' the job, Hannibal!"
> and "I ain't gettin' on no plane!" It was really funny (at least, I
> thought it was funny), but he started getting really mad at me.
>
> I guess in my dreamlike state, I must've thought that in Mr. T's life,
> there must always be that somebody acting "zany" to offset his gruff
> demeanor, and to be his comic foil--à la, the "Murdock" to his "B.A." So
> I really thought I was doing the right thing here, people.
>
> Anyway, he was busy trying to work on his van, and I just kept talking
> like him, and I could tell his blood pressure was really rising. Then I
> said won of my favourite lines: "You got a choice, Jack. You either
> talk...Or you HURT!" and he totally flipped out and started yelling at
> me!
>
> He said, "I'm gettin' tired of you talkin' like me, fool! Cut it out,
> or I'll knock you out!"
>
> So I said, "No, you cut it out! Or I'll knock YOU out!"
>
> And he was like "QUIT MOCKIN' ME, SUCKA!"
>
> So I said, "NO, YOU QUIT MOCKIN' ME, SUCKA!"
>
> And then he said "CUT IT OUT! I'M THE REAL MR. T!"
>
> So I said, "NO, I'M THE REAL MR. T."
>
> And then he lost it. He got up and chased after me with his tire iron,
> and that's when I woke up. So anyway, sorry this story had no point.
> Goodbye.
>
> Love,
> Wavy G
>